Posts tagged ‘day’

September 15, 2012

Just babbeling

How do you perceive the world, and for that matter time in its relation to the previous perception.

I remember being a kid. Everything in life was a tragedy. There were no answers to the questions as the questions had no foundation in logic or general perception. As a child, to include teenagers, we perceive the world in such a strange matter. We didn’t think in absolutes. There were no consequences to our actions if we didn’t get caught. Its was survival of the fittest and only the mentally strong survived.

At just 16 years of age 2 of my friends had committed suicide. I’m not sorry they are gone. I don’t feel bad for them. They made a choice. What I do think about from time to time is how they perceived the world. Both kids came from decent homes with stable parents of the middle class, my perception. So, one could ask what went wrong, speculate. For me I have no idea as I suppose no one else does. Maybe it can be suggested that their very souls were troubled. That their minds perceived a different world than the rest of us lived in. It is had to say what is normal when there is no biases for normality. We all must die at some point no matter how the life is taken. This particular incident is the driving force for many thoughts. Why people do what they do. Why people think or act a certain way. How we perceive the world around us.

One of my perceptions that has come from this.

I was sitting the other day thinking about the fact that I was doing nothing and that nothing in and of itself is quite actually something. For what reason was I doing nothing. Was I just being lazy. Was I bored which by the way is a ridiculous thought in and of its self because we can always conjure up something to do. Boredom is just an excuse to justify why your doing nothing. A reason to complain that the world in not catering to you at the moment. So, there I was sitting, just sitting.

If I sit and do nothing; that’s my choice. If i sit doing nothing and wish i had done something; that’s my choice. So maybe sitting doing nothing us exactly what I want to do. If indeed it is exactly what I want to do then there can be no complaint. On the other hand, if it is not what I want to do then I should change what I am doing so that it is. Will doing nothing result in regret of time wasted. I refuse to have regret, so it can not. I must accept my actions as being a direct result of how I perceive  the world around me.
I need to work on the clarity of this one. Be back Later.

 

September 7, 2012

What measures a man

ImageIt been a couple years that I told a 17 years old kid, “What measures man is his actions, not his thought, not  his beliefs. ”

I believe this to be a true statement for all humans. It is our actions that make us who we are. It is our beliefs, opinions, values, morals that help guide our actions.

My son is 11. He is not yet a man, but still not a child. Life here is that of a vast labyrith. There are many twists and turns that lead to great black holes and dead ends. These children’s minds wonder in all directions, but down no road is there a sign that points, “This is the right way my dear child. Please take my hand and I will guide you.” The voices scream from every direction calling to the innocence of youth, making demands, challenging the very virtue of the child.

If I let my son do as he please eventually these voices screaming become reason, justification.  I see this happen all the time. Kids 15 years old stealing cars, doing drugs, having sex. Even the 17 year old had a child at 18.

My expectations are high, not because I expect them to meet them, but rather reach for them.  Everywhere in society kids are getting participation awards, feel good moments. If that’s the case then why do we even bother to educate when, in fact, all we need is a babysitter. There cheaper. Kids need to be challenged, expected to seek accomplishment.

It dawned on me the other day that my son could not cook a simple egg, because I have always made breakfast; I like cooking. He can now. Now he can make his own breakfast everyday, and he will.

I dawned on me that my son just expects me to do his laundry. Not anymore.
I will not feed or walk the dog. I will not check his math homework. They have an app for that. I will not do his chores because he wants to go play. Today he will become the man I want him to be.

He will make decisions. He will provide intelligent anwsers based on his participation in education. He will use critical thinking, and form opinions. He will change his mind when appropriate and seek truths where falacies lie. he will stand up for what he believes in and fight for beliefs where warrented. He will be kind, and do the right thing. And most of all before he leaves this house he will be judged harshly, and critically by the actions he chooses to make.

I will always be there to watch him stumble, to make mistakes and learn lifes lessons. I will catch him when he falls, and place punishment when needed. I will be firm and leave no rock left unturned.

Every failure, every one will lead him to success in life. Each and every achievement much greater than any feel good moment can provide.

Men are great when life is earned. You don’t get an award because your breathing.

September 4, 2012

It’s always a sunny day when it rains.

20120904-204935.jpgLife is a strange thing. It’s full of twist and turns hiding adventure around every curve. You just never know where the landslide is going to be.

Lately it seems that every time I turn a corner life has offered me another landslide. It’s a little rock here, a big boulder there, and a massive dump of mountain straight ahead.

If there is one lesson in life I have learned it would be most problems, issues, and concerns resolve themselves with time and patience, although they are in constant conflict. Time is the one thing that human patience just can’t stand. Patience is the act of waiting, but how long does patience have to wait for time.

Patience – the capacity to accept or tolerate with getting angry
Time – the indefinite continued progress of existence.

Just give it time. Please be patient. One is not of the other. Time goes on forever, however human patience does not. At some point patience like all things, except time, must end. At some point patience runs short. During most of life’s challenges patience is enough to suffice the boulders in our path, but when it’s not let the sun always shine on a rainy day you’ve got time.

In the last week my daughter has been sent to the principles office, my son has had a crash on his motocross bike, my grandmother is dying. The school math program is unsatisfactory. My son is putting little effort into his home work. My nectarine tree is dying from the heat. The puppy is chewing everything to shreds, and there are no cookies in the house. Yes, it’s still over 100 degrees on the west coast and I don’t have ac.

Total chaos. We all have it at one point or another. I think the trick is to find happiness in it. Find a challenge in tragedy. Passion in stress. Be an advocate where there is conflict. Seek creativity, and imagination. Nothing in this life in concrete. Time has made sure of that and if we are patient time will change everything.

It’s always a sunny day when it rains.

June 9, 2011

You should be superman

When is it our responsibility?

I’m currently watching Waiting for Superman while I run on my treadmill. I haven’t seen the whole movie so my opinion may be bit premature. I doubt it. Realizing that the movie is about our tax dollars, unions, and government. Its failing the people. It’s failing our children. Out of this failure lottery, charter,and private schools have arisen. I send my kids to charter school. The school is currently full. Every year there are more and more charter schools popping up. Two elementary schools in my district have closed. With great hope the union will collapse here.

I am no different than parents that live in poverty, or wealthy areas. I want my kids to have a decent education. I want my kids to have better, be better off. We all do.

The statistics are frightening. http://movies.nytimes.com/2010/09/24/movies/24waiting.html

Consider the following statistics cited in the film: the annual cost of prison for an inmate is more than double what is spent on an individual public school student. Eight years after Congress passed the No Child Left Behind act, with the goal of 100 percent proficiency in math and reading, most states hovered between 20 and 30 percent proficiency, and 70 percent of eighth graders could not read at grade level. By 2020, only an estimated 50 million Americans will be qualified to fill 123 million highly skilled, highly paid jobs. Among 30 developed countries, the United States ranks 25th in math and 21st in science.

Just consider the last sentence. 25th and 21st does not make us pioneers. It makes us lazy, complacent. Every parent no matter how poor or wealthy can afford pen and paper. We have resources: library’s, Internet, Discovery channel. We have the power to educate our kids. We have the power to change. We have the right to expect more, demand it.

Its summer and my kids last day of school is Friday. Their education doesn’t stop there. I provide summer school. They write their times tables, division, and this summer algebra. They read, take comprehension tests, write book reports, write stories, work on computers, take field trips. If money allows work a little magic with Lego mind-storm. They learn what the school has failed to teach. I hope.

Our society is passive. We have let the unions, the government, the powers that be use our tax dollars inappropriately in every possible way. We are being bullied into a socialist system. Dependent on the power. But………

We can make a change. Have your children write, read, do math instead of watch tv. Watch educational programs about science, the universe, cooking, animals. We the people can make the change. Together we can demand accountability. Take your children out of public schools. If there is not room demand more charter.

If second place is the first loser then what is twenty fifth place. This is what I see from where I sit. Mommies coddling their children. Poor Johnny’s work is to hard. Poor Johnny needs a trophy for second place. Teachers expect to much. Mommies don’t expect enough. Dude, man up! This is what I see. I say it over and over. I know to many mom like this. I had a mom once tell me I needed to put my mommy hat on. Are you kidding me. How can you achieve great things if your expectations are so low or swaddled in a baby blanket.

May 30, 2011

Memorial Day

I never really think to much about this. As it turns out it’s just another day off, although today I chose to come into work. It’s the first time I have worked this particular holiday in eight years.

As always I sat on my front porch drinking coffee with my husband, reading emails, playing words with friends, checking groupon. The usual stuff. Not thinking anything about the day. It just a day. Then…….my iPad started beeping with all the site subscriptions I have. Everyone was writing about Memorial day in one way or another.

The lives that have been lost; the lives that have been forgotten. The injured. The found. Every life has a value to someone. Every person has been loved. Everyone gone remembered in some way by someone.

I work with Marines. I have lost friends, and acquaintances to war. I remember them often. The smile on their faces. The sound of their voice. The kindness in their hearts. The things they loved to do with their free time: skydiving, sailing, rock climbing, biking, etc. They are all amazing men.

At work guys don’t speak of the war much. I never really ask. Their home. There with family and the war is in the past, although I hear my share of stories.  Most are amazing and totally different than what you hear in mass media. It makes you wonder, so I no longer watch stories about the war.  The Marines are proud and I am proud of them.

I have meet boys who are now men that have lost their sight, their arms, their legs, the normal mental state. I used to feel sorry for them. I don’t anymore. They are proud of their misfortune. Proud of the job they have done. Willing to do it again without regret.

I don’t think about all I am grateful for everyday. I should. We have many freedoms that others don’t.  I should be more grateful. It’s a shame we need a day to celebrate the one who sacrificed. Those who have lost their lives for our benefit. Those who have sacrificed their lives for the ones they love. The country they love. It’s a shame that as a people we forget. We get so involved with the day to day we simply don’t have the time to remember. At the very least we have today.

In loving memory of my friend.

May 29, 2011

Chaney Ranch

This is an updated post. Jantz sent us a video he made of our son. And quit frankly I am super stoked about it.

May 29, 2011

Funny little things

Years ago long before kids. My husband and I were grocery shopping. As I walked down the isle I said, “I can’t remember that one thing. I know I’m forgetting something.” Just that split second as we came around the isle he says while passing another slightly older couple, ” If we’d had sex last night you could had made a grocery list.” more often than not I just ignore him, but I hear the older gentlemen laughing and whispering to his wife, so my husband gets the glare and the eye roll which makes him proud. That is one of my favorite memories without a doubt.

When my daughter was three we were at Sams club. I told my daughter to wait with nana while I put her brother in the car. She didn’t. She ran into the parking lot. I took here back to nana. She ran into the parking lot again. I was getting irritated at this point. Then she wouldn’t get in her car seat. She made her body stiff as a board. I was seriously irritated. This went on for a few more minutes. I took her out and we were standing at the back of my SUV discussing. Ok, I was talking and she was being a stubborn child. So, I picked up a gallon of water and proceeded to pour some of it over her head. I figured this ought to cool her off. Nope. She said, ” Now I have to change my jammmies!” I love that moment. The look in her eyes. The tone of her voice. Her stubborn attitude. I will never, no not ever forget that day. That is truly my awesome daughter.

My son is funny to. He is very observant. He can turn observation in to a comedy. Just the other day we were at Food for Less. I asked him to bag the groceries and mentioned that my bags were in the cart. I proceeded to finish paying and as I turned around I noticed he didn’t use my bags. “Didn’t you hear me say the bags were in the cart.” “Yep” he says. “Those bags are for Vons. You can’t use them here.” I did not know this. He was quit serious, so I took him for his word. I will know better next time to bring the appropriate store bags. My son is very mechanical and sees the world without shades of gray. Not a day goes by without observational comedy. What’s not to love about this.

May 28, 2011

Customer service

Do you remember about five or six years ago maybe just a bit longer? You could walk into any store and nobody would acknowledge you. It was hard to find help, because all the clerks were busy doing their own thing. I remember walking into Lowes one day. I couldn’t find one person to help me, nope not one. I left. I was irritated that no one seemed to acknowledge that was there to spend my money for their services. A lack of customer service then, for me, was the norm.

I remember the day that changed. I was in Vons. The produce department is the first department you enter, and since I go early their is always a guy stocking the shelves.

“Good Morning, is there anything I can help you find.” he says with a smile.
“No, I’m good thank you.” I return.

I was put off at this at first. I didn’t know what to think. I was in customer service shock. Now I have come to expect it. Demand it actually.

Recently, I was in Target. My daughter and I were wondering around looking for an item and as we stood in the middle if the isle looking lost and confused not one but five employees walked by us with no acknowledgement. No good morning, no hello’s, no can we help you find something. Nothing. We left and bought our item at another store, simple.

Customer service gurus.

From a consumers perspective, and a moms I believe Apple and Starbucks are the most successful because of customer service. I say this a lot.

Have a greeter at the door that can welcome you and direct you to your needed item.
Have staff on the floor to answer questions.
Keep your store well lit, and stocked.
Smile, be friendly.

This just seems like common sense, yes. It should be. Some statistics show that we pay more for better customer service. I believe having more staff on the floor is worth it.

One of my clients recently bought a used Apple Mac book and a new IPad. The Mac book had some code problems so he took it down to the Apple store. They fixed it for no charge. He describe how friendly and knowledgeable they were. How they spent time and attention on his issues. He was impressed and excited. This is the type of experience that will make or break a company. Because of his experience he will no doubt tell everyone he knows.

Customer service is indeed the leading key to success.

May 28, 2011

Really

I never noticed this until I heard it from some redneck southern comedian….no insult intended.

“My car got broken in last night and they stole everything.”
“Really”
“Nope, I just made that up.”

“We are sold out.”
“Really”
“Nope, I just don’t want to sell it to you.”

“I failed my drivers test.”
“Really”
“Nope, I just want youth chauffeur me around.”

Your getting it……right. Up until the day I heard the comedian. I didn’t realize how funny really was used in this context.

This is really hot!
She is really pretty!
You are really silly when you use really out of context.

In the right context the word is very useful description. It emphasizes greatness, largeness. But thats no fun if you ask me. So a big thanks goes out to our really redneck comedians for really rocking my vocabulary. Now if I could just find one to help me with sentence structure.

May 24, 2011

We survive

When I was a little kid I lived in Oklahoma. I remember the storms, the tornado’s. I don’t remember the exact day or time when three tornado’s ripped through our town. From our house you could see them over the trees. They were huge. I was little.

Tornado’s have no mercy. They come to destroy; take the very heart of man. As a kids we would run outside at the awesomeness of these great storms while our parents watched skies. It was only years later while I was in college there that I realized the true devastation that they caused or the fear and despair that they brought. In less than 10 minutes everything, all of it, monetary, mentally. It’s all gone. Hope is all that can be let and you struggle to find that.

Sunday a young marine was sitting in my chair. As I cut his hair I noticed his wife, girlfriend was quite upset talking on the phone from across the room. He explained that her aunt was missing and the tornado had leveled the area in which she lived.

The day after the tornado, when I was a kid, we went to school like normal. On arriving one of my friends told me her house had been destroyed. Bummer. That’s all we had and we went back to our daily lives. Then, as kids, we didn’t realize the impact. It was an adults world. We played. I’m not sure what happened to her and her family. In fact I don’t even remember her name. Only the destruction that her family faced.

In southern California we have wildfires. They can be tragic. Home are lost. Animals are slaughtered by the flames. Lives are changed. In times like these the people here do all they can for others. They open there heart and homes. There is no life left untouched and no hand left un-held.

One year I had the opportunity to help a horse ranch. The flames weren’t far and any blade of grass could set the ranch ablaze. So we weeded for hours. All the hay, and feed had to be moved in the barns and the horses had to be watered done. It was all preventive. The mere sight of embers blowing in the air was a warning that this needed to be done without haste.

I look back at my life and though I don’t think about it everyday I have escaped destruction and devastation many, many, times. I’m sure you have as well.

I guess the point here is…..humans survive. Though I can’t run around the world to lend a helping hand at times of destruction. My heart does go out to these families. All of them. I admire the strength they find to get though. The hope the have to move on. The compassion they feel towards others. It makes me wonder why there are wars.

To the families in Joplin and the rest of the world. My thoughts are with you,  all of them.  You are strong and will rise above this. I know in no way will my words ever help. They wont change the devastation. I merely wanted to think out loud for a moment about the strength of mankind.