Posts tagged ‘perspective’

September 15, 2012

Just babbeling

How do you perceive the world, and for that matter time in its relation to the previous perception.

I remember being a kid. Everything in life was a tragedy. There were no answers to the questions as the questions had no foundation in logic or general perception. As a child, to include teenagers, we perceive the world in such a strange matter. We didn’t think in absolutes. There were no consequences to our actions if we didn’t get caught. Its was survival of the fittest and only the mentally strong survived.

At just 16 years of age 2 of my friends had committed suicide. I’m not sorry they are gone. I don’t feel bad for them. They made a choice. What I do think about from time to time is how they perceived the world. Both kids came from decent homes with stable parents of the middle class, my perception. So, one could ask what went wrong, speculate. For me I have no idea as I suppose no one else does. Maybe it can be suggested that their very souls were troubled. That their minds perceived a different world than the rest of us lived in. It is had to say what is normal when there is no biases for normality. We all must die at some point no matter how the life is taken. This particular incident is the driving force for many thoughts. Why people do what they do. Why people think or act a certain way. How we perceive the world around us.

One of my perceptions that has come from this.

I was sitting the other day thinking about the fact that I was doing nothing and that nothing in and of itself is quite actually something. For what reason was I doing nothing. Was I just being lazy. Was I bored which by the way is a ridiculous thought in and of its self because we can always conjure up something to do. Boredom is just an excuse to justify why your doing nothing. A reason to complain that the world in not catering to you at the moment. So, there I was sitting, just sitting.

If I sit and do nothing; that’s my choice. If i sit doing nothing and wish i had done something; that’s my choice. So maybe sitting doing nothing us exactly what I want to do. If indeed it is exactly what I want to do then there can be no complaint. On the other hand, if it is not what I want to do then I should change what I am doing so that it is. Will doing nothing result in regret of time wasted. I refuse to have regret, so it can not. I must accept my actions as being a direct result of how I perceive  the world around me.
I need to work on the clarity of this one. Be back Later.

 

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September 12, 2012

The whisper

Find wonder in the smallest things
Find beauty in decay
Find hope in desperation
Find me
I am your voice

Find words in all that is lost
Vision in all that is blind
Find me
I am your words

Find love in hate
Compassion in anger
Dream all that can be real
Dream of me
I am your heart

Don’t get lost
Don’t stay away
Don’t hide
Don’t dissolve into nothing
I will find you
I am your soul

Travel lightly
It eases the pain
Joy will overcome
We will regain
We are strong, you and I
We are one

September 9, 2012

Drive

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We do it everyday and many times we do it alone. For me driving is one of those moments that sets my mind free. I have the freedom to listen to music, think, and express my thoughts out loud with no interruption except for the occasional ringing of the phone. My car has Bluetooth by the way.

Often times I think that I should have a recorder, for no other reason than I have the perfect words to say. The only problem is that as soon as I turn one on I have no words to say at all. The words don’t flow or they become so jumbled it’s ridicules.

This is a dilemma that over the years I have yet to solve. The same thing happens with my guitar. As soon as I start recording the notes, strings, strum go flat and nothing. So I put together a list of things that I feel are the problem.

I never want anyone I know to read my blog.
I’m afraid I sound stupid.
I don’t want to be caught listening to myself talk on a recording because as you know everyone knows exactly what I am doing.

Now I know and you know that this is silly, but one simple fact remains. You don’t know me and I don’t know you. That’s why we are here. If you don’t like one of my blog posts, well you just don’t come back. Likewise, the same happens if I don’t like one of yours. There is no judgement just freedom. People in general want to be heard, but we don’t want to face failure among out peers. What better place then a blog to secretly express all that is you.

I may never get all my words in writing, but I suspect neither will you. Quite possibly some of those thoughts that I scream about in my own silence are best left there. It is possible that not writing them leads to a more precise execution of my thoughts. In facing my own dilemma I must come to some resolve.

Write because you like to.
Share your thoughts no matter how dumb you think they are.
Rant and rave about the things that make you angry.
Tell us all you love, cherish, and admire.
Write in all caps when you need to scream out loud about anything.
Most of all express yourself in any way you like.

No matter whether we like it or not we will cheer you on because your here. Believe.

September 7, 2012

What measures a man

ImageIt been a couple years that I told a 17 years old kid, “What measures man is his actions, not his thought, not  his beliefs. ”

I believe this to be a true statement for all humans. It is our actions that make us who we are. It is our beliefs, opinions, values, morals that help guide our actions.

My son is 11. He is not yet a man, but still not a child. Life here is that of a vast labyrith. There are many twists and turns that lead to great black holes and dead ends. These children’s minds wonder in all directions, but down no road is there a sign that points, “This is the right way my dear child. Please take my hand and I will guide you.” The voices scream from every direction calling to the innocence of youth, making demands, challenging the very virtue of the child.

If I let my son do as he please eventually these voices screaming become reason, justification.  I see this happen all the time. Kids 15 years old stealing cars, doing drugs, having sex. Even the 17 year old had a child at 18.

My expectations are high, not because I expect them to meet them, but rather reach for them.  Everywhere in society kids are getting participation awards, feel good moments. If that’s the case then why do we even bother to educate when, in fact, all we need is a babysitter. There cheaper. Kids need to be challenged, expected to seek accomplishment.

It dawned on me the other day that my son could not cook a simple egg, because I have always made breakfast; I like cooking. He can now. Now he can make his own breakfast everyday, and he will.

I dawned on me that my son just expects me to do his laundry. Not anymore.
I will not feed or walk the dog. I will not check his math homework. They have an app for that. I will not do his chores because he wants to go play. Today he will become the man I want him to be.

He will make decisions. He will provide intelligent anwsers based on his participation in education. He will use critical thinking, and form opinions. He will change his mind when appropriate and seek truths where falacies lie. he will stand up for what he believes in and fight for beliefs where warrented. He will be kind, and do the right thing. And most of all before he leaves this house he will be judged harshly, and critically by the actions he chooses to make.

I will always be there to watch him stumble, to make mistakes and learn lifes lessons. I will catch him when he falls, and place punishment when needed. I will be firm and leave no rock left unturned.

Every failure, every one will lead him to success in life. Each and every achievement much greater than any feel good moment can provide.

Men are great when life is earned. You don’t get an award because your breathing.

June 9, 2011

You should be superman

When is it our responsibility?

I’m currently watching Waiting for Superman while I run on my treadmill. I haven’t seen the whole movie so my opinion may be bit premature. I doubt it. Realizing that the movie is about our tax dollars, unions, and government. Its failing the people. It’s failing our children. Out of this failure lottery, charter,and private schools have arisen. I send my kids to charter school. The school is currently full. Every year there are more and more charter schools popping up. Two elementary schools in my district have closed. With great hope the union will collapse here.

I am no different than parents that live in poverty, or wealthy areas. I want my kids to have a decent education. I want my kids to have better, be better off. We all do.

The statistics are frightening. http://movies.nytimes.com/2010/09/24/movies/24waiting.html

Consider the following statistics cited in the film: the annual cost of prison for an inmate is more than double what is spent on an individual public school student. Eight years after Congress passed the No Child Left Behind act, with the goal of 100 percent proficiency in math and reading, most states hovered between 20 and 30 percent proficiency, and 70 percent of eighth graders could not read at grade level. By 2020, only an estimated 50 million Americans will be qualified to fill 123 million highly skilled, highly paid jobs. Among 30 developed countries, the United States ranks 25th in math and 21st in science.

Just consider the last sentence. 25th and 21st does not make us pioneers. It makes us lazy, complacent. Every parent no matter how poor or wealthy can afford pen and paper. We have resources: library’s, Internet, Discovery channel. We have the power to educate our kids. We have the power to change. We have the right to expect more, demand it.

Its summer and my kids last day of school is Friday. Their education doesn’t stop there. I provide summer school. They write their times tables, division, and this summer algebra. They read, take comprehension tests, write book reports, write stories, work on computers, take field trips. If money allows work a little magic with Lego mind-storm. They learn what the school has failed to teach. I hope.

Our society is passive. We have let the unions, the government, the powers that be use our tax dollars inappropriately in every possible way. We are being bullied into a socialist system. Dependent on the power. But………

We can make a change. Have your children write, read, do math instead of watch tv. Watch educational programs about science, the universe, cooking, animals. We the people can make the change. Together we can demand accountability. Take your children out of public schools. If there is not room demand more charter.

If second place is the first loser then what is twenty fifth place. This is what I see from where I sit. Mommies coddling their children. Poor Johnny’s work is to hard. Poor Johnny needs a trophy for second place. Teachers expect to much. Mommies don’t expect enough. Dude, man up! This is what I see. I say it over and over. I know to many mom like this. I had a mom once tell me I needed to put my mommy hat on. Are you kidding me. How can you achieve great things if your expectations are so low or swaddled in a baby blanket.

May 30, 2011

Memorial Day

I never really think to much about this. As it turns out it’s just another day off, although today I chose to come into work. It’s the first time I have worked this particular holiday in eight years.

As always I sat on my front porch drinking coffee with my husband, reading emails, playing words with friends, checking groupon. The usual stuff. Not thinking anything about the day. It just a day. Then…….my iPad started beeping with all the site subscriptions I have. Everyone was writing about Memorial day in one way or another.

The lives that have been lost; the lives that have been forgotten. The injured. The found. Every life has a value to someone. Every person has been loved. Everyone gone remembered in some way by someone.

I work with Marines. I have lost friends, and acquaintances to war. I remember them often. The smile on their faces. The sound of their voice. The kindness in their hearts. The things they loved to do with their free time: skydiving, sailing, rock climbing, biking, etc. They are all amazing men.

At work guys don’t speak of the war much. I never really ask. Their home. There with family and the war is in the past, although I hear my share of stories.  Most are amazing and totally different than what you hear in mass media. It makes you wonder, so I no longer watch stories about the war.  The Marines are proud and I am proud of them.

I have meet boys who are now men that have lost their sight, their arms, their legs, the normal mental state. I used to feel sorry for them. I don’t anymore. They are proud of their misfortune. Proud of the job they have done. Willing to do it again without regret.

I don’t think about all I am grateful for everyday. I should. We have many freedoms that others don’t.  I should be more grateful. It’s a shame we need a day to celebrate the one who sacrificed. Those who have lost their lives for our benefit. Those who have sacrificed their lives for the ones they love. The country they love. It’s a shame that as a people we forget. We get so involved with the day to day we simply don’t have the time to remember. At the very least we have today.

In loving memory of my friend.

May 28, 2011

Words with friends

Every now and again I get a Words with Friends bug. I just can’t seem to stop myself from wasting my time making simple words. I’m never really into the score, but who doesn’t like winning.

Now, I have been known on occasion to use a descrambler. There are times when I get stuck, or just don’t see the words before me. I usually prefer to go with a simple two letter word, and just man up to the embarrassment. It’s easier.

It doesn’t take an educated person to know that some words just are not used in the English language. At the very least there not common to most people’s vocabulary.

Paca – a large burrowing rodent in South America
Boskage – a mass of trees, or shrubs, wood,grove, or thicket Boscage
Bummalo – a small Asian fish
Crumbum – a despicable man
Epimysia. – muscle sheaths

I haven’t the foggiest idea about these words. Never heard them. Of course, it’s not to say that a person educated in Asian fishery wouldn’t know or use the word Bummalo, but words like this are not common. I think it highly unlikely, also, that people even bother to look up the strange words they are spelling.

Vowels make up everything. I learned this in first grade. Phonics are the key. If you can sound it out you can spell it out. Although it may not be a word, it’s defiantly worth the effort: ie, ea, aa, r, s, t, g, between vowels, ed at the end. It all about the sound. Simple vowel sounds is how we communicate. They are how we translate thoughts into words.

Scrabble is mind challenging, strategy orientated. It makes me think. Warms up the brain and for me is much funner than suduko. So the next time you play Words with Friends try using your mind unsteady of the descrambler. You never know what crazy word you will come up with. Not to mention blocking them from using triple.

Picul – a unit of weight used in some parts of Asia
Trinal – having three parts; threefold
Nutria – the light brown fur of the coypu. I’ll let you look that up.

May 28, 2011

Really

I never noticed this until I heard it from some redneck southern comedian….no insult intended.

“My car got broken in last night and they stole everything.”
“Really”
“Nope, I just made that up.”

“We are sold out.”
“Really”
“Nope, I just don’t want to sell it to you.”

“I failed my drivers test.”
“Really”
“Nope, I just want youth chauffeur me around.”

Your getting it……right. Up until the day I heard the comedian. I didn’t realize how funny really was used in this context.

This is really hot!
She is really pretty!
You are really silly when you use really out of context.

In the right context the word is very useful description. It emphasizes greatness, largeness. But thats no fun if you ask me. So a big thanks goes out to our really redneck comedians for really rocking my vocabulary. Now if I could just find one to help me with sentence structure.

May 23, 2011

Professionals vs Common sense

I read this article: http://nolongercensored.wordpress.com/2011/05/23/a-living-breathing-relationship/

“I’m not a professional and therefore can’t answer this question… professionally!” This is a direct quote.

At what point in time did professionals become the authority and common sense get throw out the window. The author makes clear, concise, valid points. Surely points that any good professional would make, for a price. Yet with some good old fashion common sense and experience he has come up with these on his own. Which, by the way, has saved him a bit of money both on a divorce attorney and a psychologist. With that he can take his lovely wife, assuming he’s married, out to dinner the next time he forgets to take out the trash.

I have a friend with a wife and 3 year old child that’s going to counseling. Their problem… communication. That’s a killer for any relationship. That’s common sense, communication. In fact without it we can’t even order a burger. We know it’s best approach. Yet we take a pass from using it when it comes to relationships, especially when it’s mixed with respect.

I’m mad at you and don’t want to talk now. Just say it, respect it. Space does wonders.
This is not working out. Ok, later.
Have two tubes of toothpaste, two computers. I do because I leave the lid off the toothpaste and I get angry when he’s on my computer touching my keys. Communicate these points. Easy fix.
Agree to disagree and let the dog lie in peace.

My husband and I have nothing, not one thing in common, except our kids. He loves to travel, I don’t. He loves the extreme, I don’t. He likes the news, I don’t. He likes beer, I don’t. He likes PC, I don’t. I don’t like anything he likes, but I like him. Why because of communication and respect. It common sense.

Another quote:

“What’s mine is hers and what’s hers is hers…wait! Just kidding! ”

Really, it’s true. Men see the world in these terms. They are willing to give up all worldly possessions for the woman they love. My husband is happy with my old, so I can have the new referring to computers, cars, monetary items. I’m happy. He’s happy. Items can be replaced. People can’t and I want to keep this fish. Common sense. I know you see that, right.

So why do people have to be so mean when it comes to relationships. Drag it out for months only to devastate some poor unknowing fool in love. Narcissism ring a bell.

You don’t need to be a professional to figure out that common sense = happiness, to include communication and respect. Exclude narcissism.

I hope I did justice to the original writer. Please check out his site. He makes very good points in all his posts. Truly, a professional with a great deal of common sense.

May 21, 2011

Failing

I read a featured post yesterday on failing , so here are my thoughts.

My honest emotions are infuriating. Failing is a part of life. In fact it’s how we find what we are good at. Aristotle was probably not good at sports, but rather philosophy. What if we had told Aristotle he was a great soccer player, a winner. What if based on that he became a athlete only to find after years of playing he didn’t make the cut and was told he sucked. Finally, someone was honest, but he had wasted years because of perpetual lying. That’s how I look at it. Why lie. Yes the truth hurts. Why teach your children to lie. A white, small, little lie is still a lie.

My daughter likes to sing, she sucks at it. It doesn’t mean however that she can’t find personal joy in it. My son, terrible at drawing. It doesn’t mean he can’t make a beautiful picture or find joy in the arts. These shouldn’t be career choices.

I am blatantly truthful with my kids, for some that makes me a bad parent. This is a perfect example. When my son started riding motocross tracks (mx) he struggled but loved it. One day the track was dry not up to his liking. He complained incessantly. I got mad and this is what I said, ” You can be a whiney little cry baby girl and we can go home and have a tea party or you can man up and get the job done. I’m done with your whining. Either take off your gear or ride.” I was mean. I could have been nicer for sure, but that was the turning point. He chose to man up. He accepted the conditions of the track and rode. Now he’s a rockstar on 85’s. He’s a great rider that can conquer any condition set before him. This is his passion in life. He lives and breathes it. Mx was his choice. He made it and his is willing to face any necessary consequences. The only rule I have is simple. The day you want to give it up, walk away just say so, and we will be done. I don’t see that day ever coming. He has given up holidays, parties with friends, and all unnecessary luxuries for this. He will make a great man.

Im not a fan of team sports, because there are losers and winners although that’s not how it’s played. Telling a kid he is a winner all the time only leads to a false sense of security and self worth. Have you watched the auditions for American Idol. For some they were told how great they are all of their life. Their self esteem is huge. They have a false sense of awesomeness. Randy says the suck. They go home crying. They have been living under an umbrella of lies because nobody wanted to hurt their feelings. Now what. If someone had just been honest then another greater path could have been taken. Time, life was wasted on lies.

That’s just the way I see it. Lies waste life, talent, and ultimately builds a strong resentment rather than a bond of respect. Sure I hurt my child’s feelings when I tell them they suck at something, but my kids will do great things because I was honest. My daughter is eleven and taking college for kids courses all summer. She is an amazing learner. She wants to do this. My son is at Chaney Ranch riding with pros, because he has passion and commitment. Both of my kids are individuals who make choices, decisions, face consequences, just like I do. Just because they are young doesn’t make them incapable of handling life. They are. They want to.