Posts tagged ‘seasons’

September 4, 2012

How long does it last

Tonight I’m just wondering how long I will last with the writing. I would love if it lasted forever, but…….. it never seems to. (sigh) At some point the words always leave me. I would love to say its like a bad relationship that you just never want to end, but it’s not. No matter how hard I try the words just fade leaving black, black darkness.

Words or thoughts are very much like a part of our soul. Gripping our hearts. Filling our minds. Words are what makes us unique. Just imagine a person and the words that circle them like a tornado. What words would you see? Now imagine those words are gone and all that is left is a hallow body. That’s how I feel when I can’t find my words.

Write about anything. I could write about the old coffee pot, the torn rug, the family pictures on the wall but it just words describing nothing of relevant value to me. It makes no sense in my mind. Means nothing.

The world is expressed by raw emotion: happiness, sadness, despair, laughter, honesty, lies. It where my mind focuses. It’s who we are when you strip us of monetary possession. Who we are without all that we have? One would think we might be equals. We are not. Our minds separate us. Our thoughts make us different. Today I am happy while you are sad, different.

Who we are is a great factor in what we write. In fact writing is a factor in who we are as some people prefer not to write at all. Those who do not write leave no mark other than their actions which fade in time. Those who write leave behind a legacy of words to be understood and interpreted by all who cross there path.

No matter how I try the words always leave me. I want to say this time it will be different but it may not be. I want to say that I will try harder, but I won’t, because as humans we don’t. We accept many things about ourselves with no desire to change.

When I write I feel a sadness like no other, though I am happy with unlimited contentment. When I write I feel passion soaring from my soul. Then I crash, and nothing. There is nothing left.